Thursday, January 29, 2009

To the Warren County Board of Education...

Please accept this bill in the amount of $5,000.00 for the following:

Therapy for my children after seeing Mommy cry whenever the Polar Report comes on: $147.99

Water and detergent for 47 extra loads of laundry due to excessive clothing and dressup changes: $88.97

Copays for pediatrician visits for potential frostbite and various other cold weather-related issues because OH MY YOU ALL MUST GET OUT OF THE HOUSE BEFORE I START CALLING YOU NAMES!: $80.00 ($20.00 each child)

Additional groceries and snacks because SERIOUSLY why did I ever complain about $1.65 for lunch? They have eaten MUCH more than that being home all day!: $95.42

Hot cocoa, which apparently is NON-NEGOTIABLE for my children to play outside in the cold: $15.83

Meals eaten out because at some point, we just need to GO SOMEWHERE, ANYWHERE, and why not eat while we're there, too?: $52.50

Miscellaneous toys I caved and purchased after hearing about them for no less than 87 hours in a row: $62.47

Punitive damages, which would be higher but I think the limit, were I to sue for damages, would be $5000.00: $4,456.82

Thank you for your consideration. You can be assured that the punitive damages will go toward massages and other worthwhile forms of therapy (retail, food, etc) once the SIX DAY WEEKEND is over.
Sincerely,
Boorishly Grouchy in Bowling Green

Can you tell we're a little stir-crazy here??

**The picture is not directed at the school system in any way, just a reflection of how crazy we are starting to drive each other! No disrespect is intended, but it's the 3rd day we've been out and our "country roads" here are clear!! I love my children and am thankful to be able to be home with them, but OH MY I am tired and frazzled, as well as sad to think that these days OFF are going to mean they will be IN school on those lovely first days of June instead of at the park!! If you don't find this humorous, please just move on and pretend you didn't see it!

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

SNOW DAY!

Alternate title: "At this rate we'll be in school til June"
Luke's first time out in the snow! He giggled when it blew in his face, but looked suspicious when I pulled out the camera to try to document it :) He's a cute little stinker!

I don't know why I try to get all 4 in a picture...it never turns out well. But here's my attempt!
"More bars in more places!" Ironic because the BG area (and maybe more?) has been out of AT&T cell service during the ice storm.
Catching snowflakes on their tongues


Monday, January 19, 2009

Not Me! Monday

It's Monday again! Head over to MckMama's to check out all of the things that most certainly were not done this week!

If you know me at all, you know that we for sure did not keep our pajamas on all day long! No, we always dress for success around here.


And while we were at Walmart this week, of course I did not let Jack talk me into buying Batman and Superman pajamas (with a cape attached for cryin' outloud!) for baby Luke!

And what kind of mother would let her 7 month old crawl around the house in nothing but his diaper when it is 2 degrees outside? Not me, that's who! And my couch did not spend most of the week covered in laundry. Nope, NOT ME! And a not-naked crawling baby Luke totally did not pull down as many of the folded clothes as he could reach and drop them on the floor or back in the basket. Nope, not us! We don't do silly stuff like that around here.
I also would never allow that same crawling baby to open the cabinet and pull out and chew on the kids' DVDs. That would be so irresponsible. And if I did do that, which of course I didn't, I would not continue chatting on Facebook while he did it. And I for sure would not update my Facebook status to admit that I was letting him do that or that I thought it was both cute and funny. Nope.
And for real, y'all, I would not run outside in my sock feet because I am too lazy to put on shoes and snap a quick picture of the barn in the snow. Which would mean that my feet would also not have been in the snow. That would just be crazy!
Finally, I most certainly, absolutely, totally and completely do NOT love this picture of my two oldest reading the Bible together (of their own free will)!

Friday, January 16, 2009

I got some 'splainin' to do

I was watching the evening news last night, which I rarely do because I can't handle the doom and gloom perspective. They were covering the inauguration plans, and Jack (he's 4) walked in the room. Thinking he probably wouldn't have a clue, I pointed to the screen showing the president-elect and said, "Do you know who that is?" Of course, the screen immediately flashed to Katie Couric, and he did NOT know who she was. :) Then the president-elect came up again and he said, "That's Rock Obama!" I was quite impressed, especially considering he called him "Da Pajama" during the election. My "maybe I'm not a failure as a mother" bubble was burst when he followed that quickly with, "He stole all our money!" Do what?! Before you think we have a little racist on our hands, I finally figured out that he had gleaned this nugget of misinformation from a conversation I had with the big kids in the car BEFORE the election in which I said in very general terms something along the lines of "Republicans think people are the best stewards of their own money and Democrats think the government is the best steward of people's money." Apparently in his mind that translated to "Barack Obama stole all our money". Oh my. I hope he's not right.

Monday, January 12, 2009

"Not Me!" Monday

I've enjoyed MckMama's blog for a while now, and love her "Not Me!" Mondays, where she describes things she most certainly did not do this week. I thought I would join in this week because there are several things that for sure did not happen to me!

First, I'll start off with something someone else for sure did not do...Jared absolutely did not let one of the wild barn cats into our house the other night while the kids were asleep! Nope, that would never happen here. And then that cat definitely did not hide under several pieces of furniture while we tried to trap him/her. I'm absolutely certain that Jared didn't say, "And that's how Jared got rabies!" right before the cat headed my way, and my response to that was not to squeal and back away from the cat, swatting at it and allowing it to crawl under yet another piece of furniture. Nope, not us. We've got it together here.

Well, that wasn't too bad.

You must also know that Jack most assuredly did not get his hands on a *childproof* lighter while I thought he was napping. And there is no way he got it to light for just long enough to leave TWO burn marks on the (vinyl) window shade in our bedroom. It's also not at all possible that this is genetically inherited from my side of the family, because my baby brother did not EVER take a lighter and hairspray and severely burn the mini-blinds in his room while we were living at home. Nope, not in my family. We are SOOOOO above things like that.

Even though Jack totally did not burn the blinds, if he had, I for sure, being the supermom that I most assuredly am, would not spank him and leave him in his room for the rest of the afternoon. And there's no way I would just totally ignore him because I was a little afraid of what I might do to him. Nope, not me. If anyone, hypothetically, had any suggestions for how they would deal with such a child, they could feel free to leave a comment about it. Not that I would need it, because none of this could ever happen in my house! And I did not tell the little mister that his daddy would deal with him when he got home. And I did not NOT tell his daddy what happened on the phone so he could have some time to prepare himself before he got home. And I most certainly am not hoping like crazy that Jared has some genius parenting trick up his sleeve to deal with this problem, because I do not have absolutely no idea what to do. Good thing, because that would be a tough situation! Whew! Glad it's NOT ME!!

See, that was totally not so bad!